Three Little Pigs: The Revenge

The pigs don’t get much play on theteet.com/

Why?

Well, some of it might be because pigs are soooooo early 2007. Been there, done that. And also, they are evil.

Keeping one orphaned pigs lessens its power. But with three pigs … things are different.

Every morning that I take food out to these beasts, I feel a bit reluctant. All I can think of is how I’m making them stronger. I’m providing them with ground corn, oats and vitamins, and they’re taking those nutrients and they’re turning them into lean muscle mass: Muscle mass they will use to one day eat my baby.

Sometimes when I have Eleanor in the sling for morning chores, I wonder what would happen if I dropped her, and how long it would take them to eat her.

Granted, these pigs have not so much as smacked their pig lips around Molly or Eleanor. In fact, if one were not paying close attention, he or she may think these pigs have developed a kinship with my children. Molly sometimes holds her little paw up to their pigs noses as they sniff and she giggles uncontrollably.

But they’re planning something. Oh, yes. They want to eat my babies.

We'll see this in our nightmares.

I do not trust these pigs.

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