get this off my chest!

See? I’m already making tumor jokes!
 
This morning I went to Boob Doc No. 1 in Dublin, thinking that they’d take a look at things with ye old ultrasound, confirm that it was a hormone-related tissue growth and send me on my way. I was a little disheartened when they were like, “BIOPSY—STAT!”
 
I don’t like hearing words like, “we found a mass,” and they used the word “probably” before “benign” again! Stop doing that!
 
The whole time the nurses were very reassuring, telling me that everything was fine, but the urgency with which they wanted me to get looked at by another breast doctor and also to get a biopsy made me a bit frightened. I mean, sort of.  I have grown accustomed to a feeling of doom, so it might just have been all the other worries rattling around in my head at the moment.
 
My OB had made it sound like the ultrasound would confirm that everything was cool. A few other lumpy-boobed girlfriends of mine seemed slightly disturbed that they ordered a rush on an somewhat invasive procedure, considering the pregnancy and everything. But I think we’re all over-reacting. The benign version of the lump, Fibro-something-or-other, is caused by 1.) hormone fluctuation, and 2.) stress. Hellloooooo. I am a perfect candidate. I don’t know why they think it could be anything other than that. Hopefully I just got stuck with the World’s Most Overly Cautious Radiologist?
 
Either that or God is mad at me for not immediately jumping on this nursing thing, so he’s guaranteeing that I’ll continue to spend the rest of my workdays in a hospital? CRAFTY MAN!
 
They were going to schedule something tomorrow, but the somewhat creepy-looking Boob Doc No. 2 isn’t available until NEXT Friday to poke a needle at me. I hope they don’t take TOO much. I haven’t much to spare.
 
So I guess I’ll just pretty much hang out until whenever and try not to worry. Typical. I’ve got doctor’s appointments on April 27, 28 and May 1. And then the OTHER ultrasound on May 4. Here’s to hoping THAT one will go better than this one. Plus the two appointments I already had this month and a trip to the dentist — and I am totally high on co-payments. I haven’t even paid off my miscarriage yet, and already. These children are sucking me dry!
 
But at least I have a sweet distraction from this impending dead baby fear, right?
 
The funny part of the story is that they left me alone in the room with the ultrasound machine, and I TOTALLY tried to use it on my abdomen, but nothing came on the screen. Alas. There was probably a button I needed to push.

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  • thesleeperhit

    Hope you’re doing alright. That doesn’t sound like a fun day. You have the right attitude, though!

  • http://lemonscarlet.diaryland.com jessi

    Dude. What the HELL? You are like the poster child for the Worst Case Scenario books. Geez Louise. You are one person I will never say something to like “Well, at least it’s not _____”

  • theteet

    cancer, pregnancy, chickens … we’re never boring here at theteet.com! ;)

  • Jen

    I will be praying for you lady. I liked it better when awful things were only happening here.

  • jessm

    wtf. i will pray a lot about this.