today i had a buffet and i just ate a lasagna.
initially i thought that maybe jonsie‘s trying to fatten me up so that he can wear my skin as a suit, but more recently i’ve come to believe that the problem is:
i gained 5-7 pounds in the short time i was knocked up, and as a result had to trade in my old jeans to borrow some larger jeans. i’m still wearing these larger jeans. this wouldn’t be a problem except that my whole life i’ve relied on the snugness of my pants to signal when it’s time to stop eating.
i have hit the gym more often recently, but i really need to collect all my collateral jeans from that sexy girl in ashland.
i’m like one of the goldfishes.
you know. if you put me in a bigger bowl, my appetite will accommodate.
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