congrats are in order

six years and one major brain bleed later, my kid sister has graduated from the ohio state university.

good work, little one.

she’s got a piece of paper in animal sciences, and has already secured gainful employment. she will not, contrary to popular rumors, be paid to smear make-up on baby seal eyelids. she will be injecting blind monkeys with AIDS. i’m kidding. i think she’s actually curing cancer by cutting up dead rats, as i understand it.

anyway, way to go, sis–although i wish you could’ve graduated winter quarter. i think i have sun poisoning from spending five hours in the 90-degree heat at the ‘Shoe.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm NBC newsman brian williams (better known as the 2008 OSU commencement speaker) is totally dreamy.

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