Two for the Record

One:
Friday morning, I awoke and sleepily let Maybel out as I normally do.
I watched as the pig moseyed her way over to the barn, where a large mama deer happened to be standing in the morning fog.
Instead of fleeing, the deer froze, and Maybel the Great Deer Hunter remained oblivious.
I couldn’t stop watching as Maybel walked closer and closer. What would happen if she walked right into the thing? She was about two feet from the deer when she stopped for a morning poo.

It was a picturesque country living moment. Maybel taking a big, steamy crap beside a grazing deer.

Ah, Knox County.

Two:
Also, this was one of the better weekends on the farm. We worked outside both days in the garden, elbow-deep in dirt, occasionally singing hymns and probably some similar tunes sung early in our country’s history. Only we aren’t slaves. The tiller is too loud and vibratey, so we hoed and cultivated by hand. My back hurts and my hands are blistered and strangely stained with mud. I can’t get the dirt off, despite several rounds of scrubbing. Don’t know what the deal is there. The carrots are starting to happen!

We took two drives, one on Friday and one on Sunday so that Seth could brainwash me. It worked. By the end, I was saying things like “We’ve GOT to get ourselves some lambs. And a cow!” We happened upon the Velvet Ice Cream Making Place in Newark and split a turtle sundae. They were having some sort of festival, as some dude was singing God Bless the USA. I tried to avoid looking at the clowns.

In the car, among many topics discussed, I attempted to bury the tragedies of 2007 with a big sigh of relief and said something along the lines of
l-jo: It’s been a rough six months and I’m really worn out but I have this weird feeling things might be looking up.
steter: you crazy woman and your emotions
l-jo: ?
steter:
steter: let’s get a horse and buggy so we can ride it into the farmer’s market.
l-jo: did you just call me crazy for saying i was sad about my dead grandpa and then suggest we purchase a horse and buggy to ride around Mount Vernon?
steter: that sounds like something you’d put up about me on your blog.

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  • MERLIN

    Wonderful choice of photos at the right there, LJo. Question – why am I the only one who’s identified by my complete name? A little scary… and you spelled my first name wrong as well. L-I-N-S-L-Y.

  • The Experimental Dater

    Loving the user guide lover! I actually laughed out loud at work. In turn I had to read everyone what you wrote about me. So true.

    Tell Steter he is the crazy one, but we love him anyway. ;-)

  • Bad Town

    Yeah, I need a new headshot.

    That greasy, bloated visage ain’t gonna cut it, no way, no how.

    I’ll get back to you…

    …though this might work:

    http://www.wpca.com/Web%20ADS/billy_melville_2006.htm

  • captain cool

    add your blog to my loves. I’m addicted.

  • Mae

    I’m glad your carrots are happening. Every thing I’ve had has been eaten by squirrels, birds or deer. In fact, when I got home today, a complete FLOCK of birds flew out of my garden. Which is only 8 by 10 feet.

    Everything…yellow peppers, tomatoes (all 7 kinds), strawberries, raspberries, lettuce and herbs.

    So I’ve started calling wildlife by their rightful names…urban bitches.

    Maybe Farmer Teet can give me some advice. I’m not above getting a BB gun. (I’m all talk.)

    Can I record you saying you love me?

  • crankin

    look who’s dropping the ball now.

  • L-Jo

    whhhhaaaaa?