Monthly Archives: October 2006

don’t need no credit card

My mood is elevated significantly because the Daily Show is in town. We’ve decided to allow Jon Stewart to impregnate me, should the opportunity arise. I’m banking on a hope that maybe Samantha Bee’s baby needs a PA. also, why … Continue reading

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on gas and cash and such.

There’s nothing more humbling than coming back to work on Monday to find you’ve left your Honda Civic idling with the doors unlocked and the radio blaring for almost 48 hours. I knew this girl in high school once who … Continue reading

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Unhonorable mention

my old man and I finished 253 and 221, respectively, out of 320 runners in the Dead Celebrity 5k on Friday night in Westerville. Mad props to Team Work, who finished and impressive 143 and 108! Sorry to drag down … Continue reading

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Feb. 1, 2007

As long as he gets up to 200 pounds, and as long as we find a way to get him to Dee Jay’s parking lot in Fredricktown between 1 p.m. and 3 p.m., the reservation has been confirmed, and the … Continue reading

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the scoop

on our Possum Street neighbbors. The house’s Knox County location recently was closed down after an untimely visit from the vengeful specter of decay. Please note reporter Garth Bishop missed his only chance to give Bangs some publicity. As self-appointed … Continue reading

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ohmigawdbestthingever.com

Sometimes, the blog titles just flow like honey. I went with the first one that came to mind. It has recently been brought to my attention that He Who Asks Will Also Receive. A colleague/boss of ours recently shared this … Continue reading

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in sheep’s clothing

if, for example. you have spent the last three days listening to Johnny Cash read you the new testament and if, for example, Jesus has been crucified on three separate occasions (once along Henderson Road, once along autumn’s favorite tree-lined … Continue reading

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an open letter to knox county spiders

Dear Knox County Spiders: We had a deal. I let you roam inside my home for free. You stay out of sight. Not only have you breached our contract and appeared frequently before my eyes, but you have entered Key … Continue reading

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survivor’s guilt

I think that my husband and I are strange. First of all, for my August birthday, which was also on a Tuesday, I took great pride in the fact that we both had a bowl of soup at Ruby Tuesday’s. … Continue reading

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a holder of place

i have not forgotten you. bear with me until after noon. yes, all bears this way. with me. until noon. – the management. to discuss:- 4 of 15- Guernsey County- johnny cash- surprises- pies of all sizes feed me.

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