If you choose to purchase your home “As Is,” these are the top five things you never want to hear your home inspector say… (It should be noted that you’ve paid $300 for your home inspector to be there):
1. I’ve seen houses in New Orleans in better shape than this one.
2. It would probably cost less to rent a bulldozer.
3. I’d say it’s “borderline uninhabitable.”
4. I don’t really feel comfortable standing here. (For fear of collapse)
Homebuying is fun.
-At our price range, any home with a tiny bit of acreage is likely to require some repairs. The trick is finding one we can get away with.
-This “home we can get away with” does exist or will exist. It will just take patience.
Also, I have been less that forthright with you. It was not a tapeworm, unfortunately, but just a stomach virus. I’m not sure where I acquired it, but I’m pretty sure it was God’s way of punishing me for tanning. Like, in one of those sweaty capsules with the lights and the sub-par disinfectant spray.
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