Thank you, mama

Can I talk about birthin’ babies and still say fucker?

I just spent a huge chunk of time constructing, for you, dear reader, a play-by-play of the grueling-but-hilarious birth of my first and only nephew, including quotes from hallucinating soon-to-be grandparents, Eve, God and the Stone Temple Pilots.

I was attacked by Pop-ups…a series of some sort of Casino advertisements…and sadly, all was lost. I even attempted to “Copy” during the last seconds, but when my computer recovered, there was nothing left to “Paste.” Utter despair.

I have not the heart to recreate it, so know this.

Jacob Michael Teter was born Saturday shortly after 11am, after 27 hours of natural childbirth. No Epidural. No “Vicatin”. No Morphine. Not even a handful of Tylenol. My sister-in-law Christy (Johnson) Teter is tough, and the thing that came out of her is beautiful. It could have been a lesson for us all.

And i don’t care how much you love or hate kids. Hold a thiry-hour-old person and i promise that you’ll want to make one too.

Now, I instruct you all to think of the crazy aunt or uncle you love, but would never want to be. Maybe an encouraging story or two of these people would help me recover in my time of loss.

(Mug Rugs? …anyone?)

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  • Anonymous

    I would LOVE to make a baby with you. I love you and your blog.

  • Strader

    Sorry about the annoying phone calls… we were going to drive through Columbus if you had the time… we were on the road… I thought it was important.